Simple to disconnect: Former social media addicts share their stories

In an era where social media is considered a central tool in our lives, it's hard to imagine our daily routine without updates, likes, and shares. However, some people have managed to disconnect from social networks, as reflected in data from the PEW Research Center, published on the Israeli Internet Association's website, which reveals a clear trend of declining social media usage in Israel in recent years. The percentage of users dropped to 78% by the end of 2023, compared to 83% in 2019, with a particularly noticeable decrease in Facebook usage, which shrank from 90% to 87% in the past year.

Eliran Gihasi, a customer service manager, 40 years old from Petah Tikva, was among those who fell in love with Facebook from the start. "I started with Facebook at 23, like everyone else, pretty early on. For many years, I spent hours on social media. Until a year and a half ago, I was still there. On average, I spent 7-8 hours a day, posting, writing key phrases, sharing on my wall, being exposed," he describes.

In addition to his activity on Facebook, Instagram was also a part of his life, mainly due to his background as a fitness coach: "I gained quite a few followers, close to 8,000, because I used to be a fitness coach and shared many tips on nutrition and weight loss." However, at some point, he began to distance himself from Instagram until he abandoned the platform entirely, keeping only an active Facebook account.

The significant break with Facebook happened during the public debate over the judicial reform: "More and more irrelevant things started popping up, mostly advertisements. All kinds of political groups were born, which didn’t interest me," he says. According to him, the political discourse and societal division led him to realize that Facebook no longer served his needs. "I understood that I was more reactive than decisive," he explains.

Gihasi's decision to quit Facebook was absolute. "I decided to remove myself from Facebook, and over time I discovered that I was fine with it," he says, adding that he is still content with the decision. "I feel sorry for people who are still stuck there, including my mom," he says with a smile. Gihasi shares that instead of dedicating time to social media, he spends more time with friends and family: "I meet with people more often, call people, visit, read books, watch series, go out of the house. Thank God, I have been blessed with many friends, and there’s always someone to talk to."

And no, he doesn’t miss social media at all: "If I travel abroad, I won’t post pictures on Facebook but will send them in the family WhatsApp group." His message to those still connected to screens is clear: "The secret is simply to live life, not get stuck in front of the screen. There are people waiting for you to be with them."

"A Whole Day with the Phone"

In a time where social media has become an integral part of teenagers' daily lives, disconnecting seems almost impossible. With constant access to TikTok, Instagram, and other platforms, young people tend to spend many hours on these apps, often neglecting other important areas of their lives. Yaela, a 17-year-old high school senior from central Israel, chose to disconnect entirely from social media and shares her challenging yet fascinating journey, including the difficulties she faced and the new discoveries she made after quitting social media.

"I was active on all kinds of networks – TikTok, Instagram, and more," she says. "Between the ages of 13 and 16, I spent about four hours a day on social media. There wasn’t a specific trigger that made me stop; it was a process. After some time, I realized it didn’t make sense for me to spend so much time there instead of communicating with friends and family."

In the year since she quit social media, Yaela discovered a new world of activities and hobbies. "My life is full of many varied things – friends, knitting, cooking, books, series, and more," she shares. "I really discovered things about myself that I didn’t know existed before disconnecting."

Yaela shares that she briefly returned to TikTok: "I downloaded the app and saw that I wasted a whole day with the phone, didn’t eat or drink. For me, TikTok and Instagram serve the same purpose," she says, urging parents to monitor their children's social media usage, moderate it, and find alternatives: "If a child wants to download a social media app, parents won’t be able to force them not to, and it will only lead to more conflicts and distance. But they can offer alternatives and develop hobbies. Today, I am completely at peace with myself, strong enough to know I won’t go back."

Reut Almalem (40), a kindergarten assistant from Rishon Lezion, who disconnected from social media a little over a year ago, talks about her addiction to it: "It's very addictive, and there’s no real interest in it, just burning time. I would find myself scrolling endlessly on Facebook, not noticing that two hours had passed. Later, I wanted to follow someone who makes food, so I opened Instagram for that. It also took up my time because I was tempted by other content. It's addictive; you can find yourself not paying attention to your kids. After a day at work in the kindergarten, I would scroll for another hour and a half in the afternoon, and again in the evening from 9:00 to 11:00 PM. I felt irritable; it just does something to your brain."

She describes how social media distanced her from personal relationships in her life: "I would visit my mom, and instead of talking to her, I would be scrolling again. It’s fake, a total illusion in my eyes of everything happening on social media. Three and a half months ago, my father passed away from a severe illness. A month before his death, I wanted to join a cancer support group on Facebook for information, and after he passed, I posted only a story and got responses. It sucked me back in, so I got out of it completely. You get a response, and you feel the need to reply. It simply steals time."

Today, she appreciates the change: "I feel like I’m not wasting my time anymore, more available to my family and the people around me, talking to them and not feeling stupid for scrolling on Facebook during Friday night dinner," she says. "I decided that it wouldn’t control me, and I’m happy to say it wasn’t hard to disconnect. Even in my work environment in the kindergarten, I’m not tempted, and I devote all my attention to the children – it’s a commitment. I’m sure this is behind me, and I will never go back to social media."

“A Constant Battle”

Journalist Dror Globerman, a content creator and TV personality, is very familiar with the dilemma of social media. On the one hand, it’s an essential work tool for people like him, but on the other hand, it’s addictive and time-consuming. "People say 'I find it interesting or not interesting there,' but I hear something else," explains Globerman. "It’s actually related to dopamine and adrenaline. Social media functions as a brain reward mechanism. People aren’t always aware of this, but they get addicted to these hormones. You feel better or worse about yourself depending on how you’re portrayed there – especially in terms of body image on TikTok or Instagram."

Regarding the decline in Facebook usage in recent years, he says: "You have to look at users' time allocation. People are simply moving to other platforms like TikTok or X (formerly Twitter). Some don’t want to be left behind, while others feel that social media no longer interests them or that they can’t handle the mental pressure it creates."

Globerman also shares his personal struggle with social media usage: "I am very aware of the enormous price they extract from us as a society and from me personally. I am in a constant battle, not always successful, in trying to reduce usage. If I’m busy with work, that’s good because I’m focusing on creation and not wasting time. But when I’m tired but not enough to sleep, I’m drawn back in, and it’s a shame. The algorithm knows exactly what interests me and gives it to me, and I also need to post and create content. I don’t know any content creator who can afford to disconnect completely from social media. If my profession were different? Maybe I would be able to disconnect."

According to Globerman, smartphones should be banned in schools. "The governor of New York took an important step – banning phones in schools. It’s a significant message, especially in a place like New York, the heart of progress. She understood the negative consequences of phones on children," he says.

"I’m trying to promote a similar initiative at my daughter’s school, where she’s in fourth grade. It’s a strong message – let’s allow children to be children. Cigarettes and weapons aren’t allowed in schools, so who said smartphones should be? There is so much evidence pointing to their harm. Let’s wake up before it’s too late," adds Globerman.

Dr. Asaf Weiner, VP of Research and Public Policy at the Israeli Internet Association, describes a situation where the younger audience is moving from Facebook to other platforms, with a general shift in their relationship with social media. "The decline in Facebook usage is mainly due to its lack of relevance for younger users," he explains. "They have transitioned to more dynamic platforms like TikTok. However, this shift doesn't mean they aren't using social media but are more selective about where they spend their time."

"Young people no longer find themselves on a platform that requires social connections based on fixed friend circles. In contrast, TikTok and Instagram are driven by more random content, which makes them more exciting for younger audiences. People with active accounts may not visit Facebook as often anymore. Many open it every two to three days, or even less. We see a decline in daily usage, but this doesn’t necessarily mean people are deleting their accounts," he said.

He added, "This is primarily related to age and interest in the content offered by these platforms. Instagram and Facebook are both owned by the same company, Meta, so switching between them still benefits the brand. However, social interactions are increasingly happening on WhatsApp rather than traditional social networks."

"Social media platforms are indeed designed to tap into our behavioral psychology. Class-action lawsuits in the U.S. have already pointed out that Instagram's user interface includes addictive elements aimed at holding our attention for as long as possible," explained Dr. Weiner.

Weiner himself left Facebook about five years ago and believes it's possible to lead a full life without social media. "It's important to remember that there's always the option to 'vote with your feet' and leave platforms that harm privacy or promote addictive behavior," he said.