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The Jerusalem Post

'Dee Inglish Revolooshon': Changing the spelling of the English language - review

 
The Union Jack, the flag of the United Kingdom. (photo credit: Rian Ree Saunders/Wikimedia Commons/JTA)
The Union Jack, the flag of the United Kingdom.
(photo credit: Rian Ree Saunders/Wikimedia Commons/JTA)

A new book describes a revolution in the English language, changing it for sound-based spelling.

David Herman’s new novel Dee Inglish Revolooshon (“The English Revolution”) explores the imaginative concept of how a revolutionary change in English spelling might play out in practice. He conceives the idea of Dayvid, an intelligent pupil at school but unable to read or write in standard English. A sympathetic teacher has the bright idea of rewriting part of a textbook phonetically so that the spelling replicates the sounds of the words when spoken. The result is spectacular in terms of Dayvid’s immediate ability to read and write. In the long term, it has even greater consequences for Britain and the rest of the world,

The joy of this novel is that Herman takes his basic idea and allows his imagination to run riot, sweeping his readers along with him on a delightful and subversive romp. Herman’s out-of-the-box imagination was revealed in previous novels, such as The Golden Eggs of Sacramontes, about the first human to lay real golden eggs; and The Lost Manuscript, about the discovery of an unknown play by Shakespeare. Dee Inglish Revolooshon is written in the same tradition.

Herman was born in London. He moved to Israel in 1966 after graduating from Cambridge University. In the late 1970s, he collaborated with well-known cartoonist Uri Fink on the adventures of Israel’s first comic-book superhero, Sabraman.

Sound-based spelling, changing the English language

In Herman’s current novel, the English Revolution comes about because of the effect of sound-based spelling on Dayvid’s life. It makes such a difference, that he decides he must spread the benefits as widely as possible. On January 20, 2000, he launches his English Revolution – “to make English available, accessible, comprehensible to all, beyond the few million fortunate Britons born into it. English for humanity, language of the whole Planet Earth.”

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As the news spreads electronically across the globe, the UK government pledges to oppose this fundamental desecration of the English language. The prime minister says so in the House of Commons. The Queen fears for the stability of the realm. The Revolution, however, finds a highly influential supporter who arranges funding to allow a copy of Dayvid’s revolutionary Inglish Reeder to reach every British home with the Sunday papers. The effect is shattering. “It was as if the fog of illiteracy had suddenly lifted for hosts of Britons of all ages,” writes Herman, “who had…struggled unsuccessfully to master the rudiments of reading, pronunciation, and spelling of their mysterious and uncompromising native tongue.”

 A handout photo of Queen Elizabeth photographed at Windsor Castle, Britain in May 2022 issued by Buckingham Palace on September 18, 2022.  (credit: ROYAL HOUSEHOLD/RANALD MACKECHNIE/HANDOUT VIA REUTERS)
A handout photo of Queen Elizabeth photographed at Windsor Castle, Britain in May 2022 issued by Buckingham Palace on September 18, 2022. (credit: ROYAL HOUSEHOLD/RANALD MACKECHNIE/HANDOUT VIA REUTERS)

From then on, the new sound-based spelling sweeps all before it, with increasingly bizarre results. Because a large segment of the public sticks stubbornly to the traditional spellings, the country is split asunder. A leader against the English Revolution arises in the form of a charismatic Joan Spellbound. Much of the press rally behind her. But the movement has advanced too far to be stopped. The UK enters the new millennium firmly behind the sound-based spelling revolution.

“As the great Poet of the Nyoo Inglish Skool so aptly put it,” writes Herman:

“Woz, woz, woz

Iz gon forever,

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Britens, Britens never fear

Drink up yoor beer

For a brayv nyoo day

Iz heer!”

One final obstacle arises to threaten the new order. World-famous novelist Graham Marr decides to take a leaf out of Dayvid’s book by championing a movement to simplify the complexities of English grammar. He proposes to start by abolishing the past tense, seeing no sense in cases like go-went, or say-said. For the establishment, from the Queen down, who have finally come to terms with the revised spelling, this is a step too far. Dayvid, too, sees it as a threat to his own revolution.

The coup de grace is administered by Her Majesty, who appears on TV to address the nation: 

“Dear subjects, I appear before you today to inform you that I have had no option but to issue a royal decree totally banning the grammar simplifying movement from any further interference with our historic and beloved English grammar, which has withstood the onslaught of centuries and which is a sacred part of our unique language tradition. As the popular song goes ‘Enuff Iz Enuff.’”

Dee Inglish Revolooshon is great fun. Herman includes at the rear of the volume what he terms “The Basic Nyoospel Glossaree.” A glance through it reveals how much thought he has given to the spelling revolution that is the basis of the book. Herman has set his imagination free, allowing it to take him – and us with him – where it will. You will enjoy the journey.  ■

The book is available through Amazon.

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