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The Jerusalem Post

Purim Shpiel: Ben-Gvir banned from ‘va’ad bayit’ meetings

 
 Itamar Ben Gvir (photo credit: AVSHALOM SASSONI/FLASH90)
Itamar Ben Gvir
(photo credit: AVSHALOM SASSONI/FLASH90)

Purim Shpiel: The following is a satirical article from The Jerusalem Post's annual parodic Purim page, The Jerusalem Roast. Enjoy!

 The Jerusalem Roast, a satirical news section on The Jerusalem Post in honor of Purim (credit: JERUSALEM POST)
The Jerusalem Roast, a satirical news section on The Jerusalem Post in honor of Purim (credit: JERUSALEM POST)

National Insecurity Minister Itamar Ben-Gvir has been blocked from attending va’ad bayit (house committee) meetings in his building in a settlement near Kiryat Arba.

Ben-Gvir has already been boxed out of both the security cabinet and the war cabinet by Prime Minister Sara Netanyahu. But this latest move, initiated by his allies, has proven to be the most bitter for the pudgy, bespectacled attorney turned firebrand racist.

Ben-Gvir’s fellow tenants petitioned the head of the va’ad bayit, Shlomi Cohen, to distance Ben-Gvir due to his insistence on dancing the hora at every meeting, according to one tenant who requested to remain anonymous.

“He also had this cockamamie plan for us to take over the building next to us and evict its residents, and he started passing out orange flags and ribbons to everyone,” the tenant claimed.

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National Security Minister Itamar Ben-Gvir. (credit: REUVEN CASTRO)
National Security Minister Itamar Ben-Gvir. (credit: REUVEN CASTRO)

protests heat up

In reaction, Ben-Gvir has begun to withhold his va’ad bayit dues and has even gone so far as to threaten to move his family to Gaza in protest.

His neighbors have reportedly taken up a collection to help him achieve that goal.

“We wish him well; we just wish that he wouldn’t smile all the time,” said one neighbor.

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